hmmm ♥

You know , each second of silence you give cuts through my heart . Is it too much if I ask you to not exist in my life anymore ? I leave you alone , you call and say stuff that softens my artificially hardened heart ; when I feel like having a friend to talk to ; you keep your silence . ♥

Just came back from the gym . Its the first time not having yuen ling to talk to , but it felt really good focusing , and not thinking about food that much :D

The banana leaf rice lily , chia sing , peter & I had still is in my stomach , I think . :D

Ran an hour straight (dont laugh its an accomplishment since i havent been going to gym much)

, missed my itouch whilst listening to my old creative , feeling the steady rhythm of my heart beat in sync with each song .

As I drew in deep ragged breaths , sweat trickling down my forehead , the adrenaline was something I welcomed and have not felt in a long time .

The pure surge of hormones lifted my spirits to a level it has not reached in a long time , and a smile was forming at the corners of my mouth .

Guys gawking at the speed I was going for a girl and being able to sustain it - trust me , it feels good .

For once .

I wasn't the girl whose heart you smashed into smithereens . I wasn't the girl that lost her self confidence and usual bubbly , friendly self because of the countless criticism you would throw my way to defend yourself . The one , who finds it hard to even completely be her usual wacky self with new friends, to trust them . I wasn't even the girl who could laugh everyday , truly , not hiding behind a shell .

I hate the feeling of keeping my distance from people . Thats not who i am . Or have I been warped into this black hole too long that this is who i am ?

I am a risk taker . At least , that is who I was .

Either way , the exercise was welcome , and for once , for that hour , I did not recall all the empty things you've said to me , or the memories - I've came to believe the lead was a different person altogether . Even when gym was somewhere we had memories in - remember how shocked we were to discover we were all the while in the same gym and belong to the same equestrian club ? Yes , I forgot you .

And everything stressful for that moment .

Staring at the glassy reflection of myself , running forward , running towards that sanctified bliss . Where nothing else mattered but running .

Running towards ?

P/S : sorry for the emotional post . Just had to let it out :D I'm alright . I guess I tend to be a pessimistic person once I am home :D Hmmmmm . Hungry again . Joel Han ! Salted chicken , tomorrow :D

♥ rinn

i am not worthy ; yet you choose me ♥

love , love , love ♥

Okay , See , this is what you get when you procrastinate . BIGGER WORKLOADS .

Not to mention , assignments waiting for you .

Where was that excitement when you first step into college ?

I don't feel an ounce of it anymore .

My A-Levels life is probably pre-determined anyway , i'm supposed to study hard , or else no veterinary science for me . But then again , its so tempting not to have funnn :(

After CNY , full time nerd ? =/

Wohkay , anyways , just a summary on what i did :D

WEDNESDAY

went to ou with the penguin & joel (who was a "suprise") . Suddenly this fella was like standing super close to me invading my space in DIVA and i was like , avoiding eye contact .

TURNS OUT IT WAS MR JOEL LIM :D GRRRRRR .

Met up with weeyen later on , who had nice familyyyyyy :D

hahahaha i passed the aunty test hahahaha syok sendiri :D

I bought my current favourite ring after losing my ex favourite in damai .

:D :D

Went batting for the first time , and the saying starting humble ensures good results was proven right :D

(my hand was trembling the next day)

FRIDAY

Headed to CF at yuen ling's persuasion (i had no college that day nyeh heh) , watched a really meaningful show thats gonna stop my almost racism :D . Overall , meaningful .

Went to bangsar with ling to makan @ delicious , yummmmm .

Joel joined us too later on , and we were drooling over stuff again (ESPECIALLY VINTAGE RINGS)

( i good girl okay didnt buy anything this round:D )

SATURDAY

Headed to christophers house with the usual "church friends" kononya , and arrived to a pleasant sight - full of food , it was a pot luck .

Drank the ribena , only finding out later on it was "spiked" with whiskey .

But nevertheless , i dont think anyones virginity got stolen , but there were (several) attempts of sodomy . :D

So the "church friends" gambled & I am very proud to sayyyyy - i won ! Both mun and I . And I dont mean rm 1/rm2 . :D

Then the crazy stuff happened , when we played dare . :D

Nope , still no one popped the cherry , but there were a few ummm , explicit happenings :D

SUNDAY

Church then drum class as usual , ahah i suck in drums lahhh .

Headed over to vanias place , saw the "damai laut gang" which consisted of weeliam , nicholas , yujie , benjamin , vania , yee en , yuen ling & I , played somemore , won somemore :D

And of course , drank somemore :D

Shandy + Icecream Sodaaaaa = yummmmmmmm .

ARGH I would like to post more about my thoughts and delve in deeper to what im feeling but I have biology waiting for me to study if I want my perfect score , & chem assignments waiting for me .

penguin !

my (2) ring & ahkua fied joel .

heh batting , i likee :D

limweeyen ! princess ♥

delicious @ bangsar village

heh the card that got me the money :D

grinnns:D note:monopoly money exchangable for cash .

rape attempt (fail)

group picture .

making sure I had protection . :D

see , whiskey kicks in .

candidddd ;D



♥ rinn

College ! ♥

ANN ! Doesn't she look like Bella from the TWILIGHT series ?

COUGHAHEMCOUGH . Manwyn & Chia Sing . =)

Nickel II Sulphate !

Class whiz / clown .

♥


I see a beginning of a very beautiful horny friendship . =)

HOW HAS 2010 BEEN ? ♥

College has been pretty awesome , if you'll push aside the fact that I feel really stupid with all the smart hardworking geniuses in my class :D & also the fact that I'm not a morning person . The freedom is actually refreshing , though my parents aren't exactly handing it all over in a silver platter yet .

But I guess it's pretty nice to be able to walk out wherever you want during breaks - whether you feel like having a slice of the awesomest cake ever (rocky road) in chillax , save money by going to eat chap fan , going with friends to eat vegetarian food , or when you have this sudden urge to take a cab down to jalan telawi to shop .

Im actually enjoying lectures more than lab periods . Because I dislike getting all bundled up in the morning , its so cold there .

Went to HELP UC's Christian Fellowship for the second time the past friday , the "official" welcome party =) It was nice I guess to meet new people and to be able to eat nasi lemak at the end , heh . Im hoping the times Im gonna be spending over there will just be a journey that brings me closer to God .

Before that , headed to bangsar with ivory , and it was really nice spending time with her =) She has made chinese tuition so much more bearable and interesting . We ate at pappa rich after rounds and rounds of circling and being indecisive , heh . Most boutiques were closed , because it was too early . We made an oath to come back there with tons of money in hand =D

ANYWAY , took undang yesterday , OMG hahaha i BARELY studied , and i was so panicky in the morning , but thank the Lord that I got 42/50 ! Which means I just passed . I didn't scrape through . I didnt pass by a little . I JUST passed . Hahaha . But passing it means that I got to go to bengkel with the penguin dearest .

ANYWAY , PENGUIN HUN , I don't know when you can see this , but I miss you already okay ? 5 years of friendship and still counting . Youre my gym buddy , ss2 buddy , makan buddy , dancing buddy , swimming buddy , checking out hot guys buddy and everything else !

Love love you ! Have fun in UNITEN , get that scholarship , come see me everyday and make me PROUD .

♥ rin